Still Missed U

I will be hypocrite if ill say that i was over him, i missed him really, so much. I missed his voice, i missed the thought of looking forward to chat with him, somehow its really not that easy, i wish it is. I realized it was best if we started as friends and did not cross the borders, but what if we started as lovers and eventually try to redo things and start as being friends, is it possible? perhaps it is, but how could i control myself from feeling the same way as i did before, should i redo my feelings too and start from something as if he was a stranger and pretend i dont know him or worst pretend that he was not special. Wish i could do that, and forget him that easy, wish i could just vanished the thought that he is a great man and that every woman is lucky to have him, wish i didnt fall in love with him and just view things as like a normal game like what they usually do at the net, but at the end of the day, i guess i have made the best choice, of just being true, of loving someone i dont know. Perhaps its one of the most stupid things ive ever done in my life, but at least i did had this chance of realizing things in a better perspective. At least...at least..., the only fault i knew was falling in love with him, if this is a crime or if this wrong, im willing to suffer the consequence.