Wednesday, February 10, 2010

The Best of Me

Before i logged in to my account, i kept wondering and imagining a lot of things, some are dreams and some maybe superfacial ambitions. However, some things cannot be denied nor hidden that i am somehow thinking of myself in the years to come, my plans and my goals in this journey, i am somehow thinking if ever i will gte married, or will i have children or worst will the right man come? hehehe, im sorry but just cant help it, cant help but question if sometimes fantasies are real. but i knew its not, thats why its called fantasy, just lived in dreams - in our wildest dreams. I am entertain by some thoughts that life is like a theater, everyday is like a show, everyday is a stuggle to prove to the audience that we are worth watchin for, somehow my life is or should i say our life is like a piece of a shit film, we are always dying to please everyone, we always crave for pleasantries and for other people to admire us and to top it all, we want to be in a status far reachable than the rest, but isnt it too tiring sometimes to maintain the status quoe, sometimes we are unhappy of pleasing the people around us and somehow we tend to be just ourself, just me and i and myself. I hate to be self-centere and i know im not but sometimes i cant help it but to love myself first before loving others but arent we all encouraged by our faith to be other-centered, to what? to find the true meaning of love, of true love. I always tends to give the best of me, whether to a boyfriend, to my sister, to my family, to my work, to my friends, even to the people i rarely talk with, but sometimes my best wasnt good enough, is not enough and will not be enough.