emotional stuff.

Every woman should know how to fall in love without losing herself, that line reminds me of a great teacher, whom during one of our lectures, shared a very inspiring story between her and hes husband. To sum up, there stories were the typical love inspired theme, wherein both had the chance to prove to each other, that theyre worth of their love, as what our teacher quoted "in my marriage years, i never got tired of waking up each morning, still seeing his face beside me in fourty years". Her story reminds me of one great realization, that in this life of ours, its not important to marry a handsome, rich or a man in every womas dream, neither you think of a man who provides you a great conversation, who would love you despite all body changes, and marry someone who could provide smiles in your face amidst troubles in our life.

At my age, i am already thinkin of marrying, perhaps settling for good would not be that far from my priorities, im not getting any younger. To be honest, i want to pour out my bitterness and the ache that my heart is feeling right now, but as much as i want to, i want to provide privacy for him and for the relationship. I dont want to pretend i am ok, when im in turtored, i dont want to fake my smile just to let them feel that i doing great, because deep inside i am dying in pain. Pain that i still dont know, if i deserve this because i knew i did my best and i have given enough to prove to him, that he was so special, but even for courtesy's sake he didnt gave me the respect i knew all along i was worth it. I would say that for the sake of love, because i admit he doesnt have that for me, because even in simple layman's thinking, if he does..he would not allow such things to happen to me, to be hurt constantly and terribly? is that love?

I dont have other avenue to tell all this stuff because this things is getting more private, but to my readers, i just want to ask for considerations and please bear with me for this.

ill write soon,..promise