Happy Sunday

Hows your sunday guys? well for me i had a great day, my brother who was based from cebu came and visited us so it was really so good, we dine out together somwhere in a seafood restaurant and we ate really big fish, i dont even remember their names but sounds like my country is really rich in aquitic resources.hhehhe. I dont have any plans for tommorrow yet but i wanted to really go to downtown and have some papers fix. hopefully i can do that.

Crossroad

My time says its ten seventeen in the evening, probably ill be home soon, but my heart and my mind wanted to stay here. Cant figure out the reason, all i knew is that i missed the one person whom i considered so dear to me. Its really been so while since we last talked and you know talk about anything and everything we just think, i havent ask him how hes doin? or if his day turns bad? i havent told him that i love him and that even if we are on the opposite poles, loves knows no boundaries. That though im not here everyday, but i am always thinkin of you, far from what you thought.Im sorry if im making things hard for us babe, but i want you to trust me and trust each other that wherever fate leads us, our love will keep us together.Ilove u so much.

A Big Thanks

Im actually waiting for my babe to come online but i guess im late now..hehhe, he may be asleep already so with nothing to do in mind, i decided to check my blog and bravo, i have had few friends who added in my followers list, thank guys and of course i wanna mention the one person who commented on my latest post, i was really touched by his message. Thank u so much...i guess i need to go now.bye for now..

Back on my Feet

With a lot of things that troubling in my mind now, i have lots of what ifs? lots of regrets and lots of futursitic thoughts somehow. But though how hard my mountain is right now, though im trying hard to climb every step to reach the peak of it i knew its still with God's best time that will tell as to where i am now. However i am still very positive with everything that is happening, thanks to the spirit and the strength that i always drew from HIM. My faith let me survives on all this. Nevertheless i knew after all the storms that have came, one person really stood by me. I wont deny it, he was very instrumental in inspiring me to ease my mind. I love you so much that i knew deep in my heart i really dont want you to go, i want you to become part of my dreams but im afraid ill wake up that those are just dreams and will be just dreams. I wanted to hold your hand and hold you so tight so that it will take us to forever but im afraid to fall in love again, im afraid to really find myself in love again and be hurt. I knew its so hard for me to trust again, to trust your love but though its very hard for me to live a day without hearing your voice, its much harder to love you and lost you at the end. Thanks for the wonderful memries that you have brought into my life, i may not have see you personally but i have loved you, loved everything in you for who you are and not for what you are. Thank you for the love that i havent felt even to the person i have given my all. THank you for bringing back my confidence that once in my life ive known someone who had loved me unconditionally, thank you for bringing my dreams into reality.

I love You

Love is like magic

And it always will be

.For love still remains

Life's sweet mystery!!

Love works in ways

That are wondrous and strange

And there's nothing in life

That love cannot change!!

Love can transform

The most commonplace

Into beauty and splendor

And sweetness and grace.

Love is unselfish,

Understanding and kind,

For it sees with its heart

And not with its mind!!

Love is the answer

That everyone seeks...

Love is the language,

That every heart speaks.

Love can't be bought,

It is priceless and free,

Love, like pure magic,

Is life's sweet mystery!!

Troubling THoughts

1. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?-yeah i always do
2. If you could have a dream come true, what would it be?-to find the right man who could love me for who i am.
3. Do you believe in eternity love?-yeah, for as long as you have the right man.
4. What feeling do you love most?-being loved
5. What feeling do you hate the most?-when you felt stupid over someone whos not worth of.
6. Do you cherish every single friendship of yours?-yeah, i have some great friends.
7. Do you believe in God?-yeah, very much
8. Who cares for you most?-my parents, my family and ....
9. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?-i guess to be able to love someone and be loved too with no conditions.
10. What emotion do you like to show?-love, to my significant others.
11. If you have something troubling you, what do you do?-just stay in bed and think.
12. Who do you admire most?-my father, he is a great provider.
13. Who did you last chat with in a chat room?-hmmm, i dont have chatmates.
14. What kind of person do you think the one we stole this meme from is?-hmmmmm
15. What color did you use to dye your hair?-i dont do it
16. Why are you doing this meme?-because i have nothing to do here
17. What do you do when you're moody?-i just want to eat ice cream.
18. At which age do you wish to or did you, get married?-at 25 if God permits.
19. If today is the last day of your life, what will you do? i will go to the cafe, write on my blog and thank all the people who became instrumental in my life.
20. Who is the person you trust the most?as of now, my sister,and the man i love
21. Last time you smiled?yesterday, when he called up
22. What are you listening to right now?music - save the best for last
23. Who was the last person you saw in your dream?me, forgot what im doing..hehehe
24. Are you talking to someone while doing this?nah...fedility matters
25. Do you walk with your eyes open or closed?hmmm
26. Is there a quote you live by?yeah..."dont use your eyes to cry for the person who fooled you, instead use it to search for the right one"
27. Do you want someone you cannot have?yeah i did,
28. Who always makes you laugh?my sister
29. What was the worst idea you've had this week? to watch movie until morning, isnt it stupid?hehehe and ive texted my friend to come over to the house, mind u it was 1:45 am..hehehhe
30. Do you speak another language other than English? my native language

YOU

I cant get you out of my mind boy, what did u do?Words are not enough to explain, it may just happen so fast but that is excatly what is happening to me now. I think im in love, so in love with you.

LOve....LOve and LOve

THis is for those who are in love and who are also loved. This is to those who had been broken but finally found their right man. THis is for those who have felt betrayed but decided to move on. THis is for those who hoped for a happy ending but was given false hope by the man they once love, and finally this is for me and for u, who once felt the pain but finally found the man who can get that little pieces together. I dont know how to start this, but i want you all to feel how happy i am at this very moment. I dont know how it started but it doesnt matter, what's important is, i feel its right. I just wanna let you know that i really really want him now and forever perhaps. I love u babe.

Just a THought

------------------------------------------------------------

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didnt do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore.Dream.Discover"

----------------------------------------------------------

-Mark Twain

My man

I used to call him my babe, my honey, my baby, my sweety but above all he is my bestfriend, my confidante, my sweetheart just my man. He may not always be here physically but always and almost he is here, always here for me. When i decided to take a break in my career, he was the one i first consulted. I can feel how he was worried when i felt the world was stumbling down on me.When i parted ways with my former bf, ive thought it was the end of a beautiful story but He proved it wrong, he proved it once again that really distance cannot hinders a story inspired by time and trust. I have lots of things to be grateful with, but im not rushing things, this time i want HIM to make the lead. True enough, i am slowly falling in love with him...just found out recenlty.goodluck to me.

May Bukas Pa

Let me just take this chance to commend this higly rated primetime series of ABS - CBN for a job well done, you know im really not a television fanatic nor you can see me watching local drama series, its not that i dont like their genre, its just that i usually dont have time to watch them. Luckily as im in a vacation, i was given this chance to watch their after-dinner offering for both networks,on my first time to watch "may bukas pa", i really felt somethin else, its not the usual offering and rags to riches love story or an anime like what the usual trend is.

May Bukas Pa is about a boy named Santino who has the ability to see Jesus and be able to talk to HIM, he has the ability to heal and do some miracles, the story is set on a fictional inspired town named Bagong Pag-Asa. What i just like about this teleserye, is that it has lots of big surprises and not boring, it inspired viewers and really gave us refelections not only about the battle between good and evil but more importantly about our faith. Whether we believe in the same God or with different God's, it taught us that really in this world, there is still powerful person behind this and He is none other than, our bestfriend, our brother, our clasmate, our neighbor, and as to whoever you like him to address, He is our BRO.

Last night their episode was about Santino's doubt on Bro, he was actually questioning HIm as to why he is always put in messeries,he decided to leave his place with nowhere to go, he was able to meet diffrent people who gave him the same insights about HIM, at the end of the day, the lesson was that, theres no such thing as coincidence in thsi world, coz everything has reasons and all that is happening in our respective life are all meant to be. They are designed to happen for reasons we may not know, even those criminals and those less fortunate, yeah they are there for purpuses we may not either know or understand. But im sure, HE does. So to those who are really down at this ver moment or maybe we questioned sometimes why we are like this, just always put in mind that it is there coz it is meant to be there. Lets always be inspired to embrace life with imperfections, let always be positive in any trials and shortcomings. Coz believe it or not, we always have a confidant along the way, BRO.

Unknown

Just in time after i finished some online stuff, i was surprised to see an unknown call from my phone, but i just have one person in mind, no other than the closest and dearest person now,hmmm. And my bet was correct, when i come online now, ive read his offline message telling me that he tried to call me yersterday like 4 pm in my time. He was really the one. And who else will?hheheh, actually there are just few people who knew my personal number, just those who were that close to me other than my significant others. Truelly i regret not having talk to him, coz our last conversation was last sunday and it really took us almost half an hour and it was just cut off when my battery got empty, i missed him already. You know i realized God has been really good to me all through out, though sometimes i questioned his will on me but always and almost after i finally got HIS message, i certainly thank him for bringing great people on my life. To everybody out there, learn to trust.

Wishlist

Well and well, as 2010 enters heres the favorite thing to do for every blogger, heres my wishlist for 2010:

1. A cute stuff toy
2. i look forward to receive flowers this 2010
3. i wish to really see my honey personally by 2010
4. i wish i could have children by 2010 ( with father..hehehe)
5. i wish to see my brother graduating this year
6. i wish to won a laptop
7. i wish to experience really true love
8. i wish to have a vacation by this year
9. i wish i could help other people even with the simpleast act
10. i wish to earn a page rank here.

just 10 by now coz i knew it would be so hard again to attain plenty of wishlist..But no matter how long my wishes were, as the great author once said, theres no harm in dreaming and in trying but make sure all our goals and wishes are attainable. These are just wishes but like real believer of Fairy's and genies, i still wish them to come true..in time.

Rainy Morning

well a cold morning to everyone, i started to blog very early coz i was to do something so urgent. But thank god i had this chance to update once again, hence nothing so meaningful today exce[pt for my plan to go to downtown and visit my bank. But i dont know if its a good idea to go now coz of the pouring of heavy rains, wish mr. sunshine would come and visit us first, lots of hanging clothes that is still wet until now.poor clothes. Anyways, allow me to greet my visitors who were really nice enough to visits me often, to tech most especially.A big thanks.

One More Chance

One more chance for one last time. And for the very last time, allow me to reminisce the memories that was left. It was already 1 year and 8 months to be exact when I became commited to my former bf. He was a sales specialist on a veterinary product and i was an admin asst before when our love story was created by time. There was no official or should i say formal courstship that happened, it was just civil and just one day i finally wake up that we are already a couple. He used to be in my place as often as possible, yeah because he needs to be in our office coz he covers too our verterinarian at that time, I admit it was one of my happiest days in my life, i was taught to embrace simplicity in life. When i was very strict before, hes coming allow me to understand imprefections in life. After 3 months of dating, i have discovered one shocking truth that changed the entire thing, he was involved with a woman before and they have lived in, worst they already have a child. That was the day i remember change the entire me, my tears cant talk how i was broken but my heart knew that healing will not happen overnight, i was being broken into tiny pieces. The moment he confessed that truth to me, he aske dme, if i could still accept him? I knew i was blinded by my love that time, i believe i dont have a choice, its hard to leave him but i realized it was harder to stay. I decided to allow our relationship to go on with the flow. Though its really painful i accepted his son and treat him as my own, he already introduced me to his parents and to some of the friends as well. I felt it was already complete that time, i wanted to believe, we already had a happy ending. But time proved otherwise, it was just one ordinary day when he missent a text message to me, before he knew it, i already knew that he was dating his fellow collegue who was a veterinarian by profession too. It tore my heart one more time, i felt i was really betrayed but no matter how i initiated the break up, its me again who will ask him to stay. No matter how hard our trials were, i was strong enough to fight every battle, i wanted to win him everytime someone selfish enough would end my happiness, but true enough, one sided love broke the see saw down, just mid of this year when everything finally ended. A friend called up to ask how we were doing, i tried to hide everything by merely saying we are doing great, but what i dont know is that things naturally fall to where it is destined for. Too late, i have found out that he was seeing a girl from Manila and he even visited her and spend some time with her, That made me so hurt and degraded, i just lived somewhere in this province but he did not come to visit me like a loving bf would. I still tried to save for the last time our relationship, And if ever i could just turn back the hands of time, i would probably just be there for him all the time back to the days when he was mine,so that he would not have the chance to look for another girl. But i was definitely so wrong, coz no matter how we loved someone, if they dont loved us back, it would just be painful to hold on...i realized i need to let him go and i need to let myself go too. I believe we need to seperate ways for us to grow and wait for the right time. One more chance doesnt fit us at all at that very moment coz i want to believe that we need the right chance to rekindle the old flame, the flame that made our feelings right.

My friend was indeed right, wounded knees are easy to heal than broken hearts, i have been broken twice and been wounded few times but i still look forward for my falling and rising and everything in between.

Rainy Saturday

Hmmmm, as my the title says itself, we had a very cold saturdy here, wish we have someone to hug and pretty good to stay in bed today. Well i dont have plans for today except to come online and wait for my babe,hmmm, curious? well and well, the babe is not from here, he is from the foreign land..hehehe. I just wait for him to come online, unfortunately we were not able to chat, maybe he was just busy, but i knew he will read this post later. Tomorrow will be a great day for me, my bestfriend in highschool arrived and she was inviting me to come over to their place tomorrow. I missed her already, might as well go there and do a little chit chats. Yesterday, we went to National bookstore and i am really amazed that as early as now, valentine cards are already saleable, yeah, there are already plenty of valentine stuff there,i am so envy with the students who were really very busy reading those cards and trying to choose what cards best fit their loved ones, but thats lfe, we have our own share of frustrations everyday, but though my heart beats for someone miles away, still i can say that he is just so near with me, coz he is always here, in my heart - everyday.

Tell Me

Honestly i was really trying to figure out what to write in here by now, my mind is not yet working, my heart is still not in good terms.Right now i am listening to the music of Joey Albert "Tell Me", going back, this song was very memorable to me, it was my favorite song wayback in my high school years, i remember dedicating this song to my 4 years crush who was just a neighbor, i remember how i shed tears whenever i hear this song especially if it was played midnight when everybody was past asleep, i remember how i was trying to buy a lot of times in there store just to see him but now i do remember him but not the feelings anymore. But by merely listening to this song, i just cant remember him but the few people who had became part of my heart, those who have take good care of it and those who have tear it and left. I knew i cant waste my life forever, holding back and holding on coz there are still few things to look forward for, though i always ask "where did i go wrong?'' and oftentimes wondered 'why did it have to end up so soon?'' but i know someday "ill let it go with this "goodbye".

Boy

A little chances of love and new love makes a new year exciting and promising, and who would not love it? who would not like to think of an idea of fallin in love, nahhhh, im not in love with just the idea of falling again, i am occupied with the thought of falling with someone i can probably say real and reel. To those who were following with my story, they knew about the love that has blossomed before, that was nourished but to my dismay it just ends up here, yeah it ends up here in this blog, the last chapter was already written and was finally closed, though he havent bid goodbye to me, what has been unsaid was already spoken through the words from my heart, and to the lalabs you once knew, he was already a closed book, its sad that our last chapter was "goodbye", but though this blog became hiatus because of the author's time for healing, finally she had realized to write again, and once again, she is into a new dawn.she is into her new shoes again, a fighter and a new and improved woman. She will never get tired of sharing her stories with u as she never gets tired of loving, of healing and of letting go. To the man who is an inspiration now, allow me to share to them our story.this maybe far from happy ending but theres always no limits in dreaming. Till then.

Little in Reserve

Giving all is fine, wonderful but do not offer it.Men like the women with the little in reserve.Let them seek you, let them find you.THose to whom you give quickly will go quickly but sometimes those who work hard for your love also go, but that is the chance we take on love.Fight no more battles - the man who will love you will not require that of you instead he will battle for your love. Have something little for your self, coz sometimes though we wish for the same thing, one wish for the other and the other wish for another, that's why they never meet.

HONESTY

...is such a lonely word...everyone is so untrue.

UNPERFECT

My friend who is very dear to me always reminds me of one thing, though its quite a joke but it really makes sense, he once asked me who invented the eraser and why the hell it was creted, i begab to think seriously, yes he was right, eraser came into the picture because we are all capable of commiting mistakes, that mistakes are inevitable. Though this friend is really a good companion, and really makes it a point to bring humor to every conversation but this thought and lesson was less than a humor, its a simple fact that made me think of it until this very day. Like in any couple or relationship, no one and nobody is perfect, one may be beautiful but is not quite a good conversationalist, one may be so perfect in our eyes but what we dont see are those that made them part ways, see?we have our own imperfect identity, i remember my ex who usually texts me everyday of the things he doesnt like about me, he said im very dominant, im selfish, i dont know how to give him the time..etc..etc..but no matter how long his lists of my imperfections i just replied by saying, that why pencil has eraser..its not yet too late for me to change and to learn from this. THough sometimes our mistakes are our wake up calls, we should not always forget that we learn from this and through this we became a new and improved person.

This morning the ex texted me still, with those long lists of things he didnt liked me, as usual, but to his dismay i just replied......

"i love being imperfect"
mwah

sent: 01/11/10
7:01 am

Been a While

It has alreaday been a while really since my last post here, yours trully had been very busy for past few days nonetheless this simple endeavor will never be forgotten, lately a lot of things happened and a lot of realizations takes place, if you would allow me, let me share to u my learnings and thoughs for this week.

1. Not all guys who were good to us can be trusted.
2. We should always give our family a priority.
3. Love cant conquer all.
4. That..the simpliest thing to be happy...is to allow yourself to be happy..(hehhe)
5. That internet dating sites are all games.
6. Sleeping really makes our aura really good.
7. That reading is a good habit before sleeping.
8. That ist good to stand first after our dinner, to allow the food to be digested and not to be stucked up.
9. That always and almost, we forgot to make God the center of our life.
10.That///PRAYER IS THE MOST POWERFUL WEAPON.and even our most impossible dream can be real if we only have faith that it will happen...try it..( just did.)

A Happy Ending

Fairy tales do, but my life hasnt, our life do not have always happy ending, farewells normally are painful. Nonetheless, as he bids goodbye i have embraced it as a great beginning, it opens up door for new prospect, it will change things, it will change my dreams and will change my destiny. I have wished to end up with him, yes and i always dream for that, but now that he has found somebody new, it has taught me to accept things and forget the memories. At least, its not yet too late to change things as i wanted, as God wants. At least he was not a father of my children, at least he is not the man i will be commited forever, im glad it has ended. For all the miseries and pain he has brought into my life, im glad God ended it in a manner i havent understand but i have trusted his will. I am glad too that God put someone whom i could lean on when things seems so weary. I am glad he bring into picture someone who was able to fix the little pieces, and hopefully it will be done very soon so that i could give him the key in it. For that someone to trust me for that little love, thank u.

Woman

To all women who had been hurt and always hurt, should learn to give it a try to be brave enough to search for the man who will love and accept us despite great mistakes, and to all men who forgot to value our heart and a reminder that women get tired too.

Happy New Year

Its already the second day of 2010, and allow me to greet all of you a very happy new year and wishing you all a blessed and abundant 2010. I noticed that hours before the change of year, there are less firecrackers now and even lesser noise compared to last year, i dont know id its just because of the heavy rain that really stayed for the entire day and even until today, just so sad, we havent enjoy to the fullest. Anyway, it did not hinder us to celebrate, our annual christmas party was really joyous and fun, a lot of children participated and lots of parlor games were prepared which really ends our 2009 well.To all my visitors, Happy New Year!!!!!!!!!!!