emo..

im really not the type of person who bring along my stories, my frustrations to the open, but just to relieve this burden, i wanna just share my disappointments and my tears as well.

honestly, i felt broken..i felt empty...still dont know what to write this time,all i knew..i wanted to ease the pain..i just want to cry and cry and cry...and just sleep. hoping tomorrow, it would be a different day..

i dont dream for a perfect relationship nor look for someone so ideal,.a man who could just makes me laugh will do,.

i knew that relationship has its ups and downs, but i dont believe that it would bring all along the grief and pain..coz if he really loves me, he would look for ways not to hurt me either,,but every passing day, i always feel unloved, i feel being used, i felt that i am always alone, like i was before...whats the use of settling with the relationship?

It all started when i asked the typical question of "do u love me?" hopin he would reply with the most flattering words...as the case maybe,,,but to my dismay,,he left me hangin,,and choose not to answer at all..i know i didnt have the right to question him, coz nobody could force us to say things, if he really doesnt feel it, he was just being honest..

and i was just a dreamer...

its also my fault,,,i fall in love,,i should take the pain, the consequence...

accept the fact that he doesnt love me, he will not love me...
i dont know,,,it still hurts...

enough,,,

Love lesson for the day

i always feel disappointed and frustrated in my relationship

i always ask "why?', i always wonder whay the feelings bothers me whenever

im with him, i want to believe that thi will just pass, and that

its just part of the adjustments, but id didnt..

My friends always reminds me to a fact that

a relationship should always brings something good for you.

it will give you joy, somehow, pain in some few times.

frustrations, perhaps and some sort of inspiration..

I always look for that things, in him, in us..

but neither do i felt some strange things..

neither do i feel inspired

neither do i feel loved...

The barrometer should be,,

When sticking with someone else

the determining factor should be LOVE

coz everything will come along...

as i always search for that feeling, for him..

i always end up with one realization..

that you can never teach your heart, nor can you force

to be in love with somebody else...]

it always feels good to fall

and i always look forward to that very day

that i will confidently say to all

"that at last ive found the one"